Paradise Lost: Beach Vacation Blues
By Jennifer Otto

Are you dreaming of emerald green surf, sugary white beaches, mouth-watering seafood, indulgent shopping sprees and days off from responsibility? That is what vacations on the Emerald Coast are all about! However, and this is a big “however,” you need to pick the right location that best suits your lifestyle and travel companions.

Family Vacation in PCB

Christine and Tom decided to take their two daughters to the beach for summer vacation. Christine looked online for the top travel destinations in the country and came across Panama City Beach as the number one location on more than a dozen Web sites. That’s perfect, she thought, Panama City Beach is only a six-hour drive from our home in Alabama, and it is right on the beach. She decided to tell Tom and the girls where she picked, and they were all completely excited.

Two weeks later they drove to Panama City, fighting through traffic and battling for a room in a local hotel. Once Christine and Tom had a room, they left the girls inside with the door locked and went to get the luggage from the car. Two guys stood in the parking lot looking confused. Before Tom could open the trunk of the car, one of the boys started vomiting all over the ground. After getting the luggage inside, they thought their nightmare was over …

The girls looked disturbed and pointed toward loud music on the balcony. Tom went out on the balcony to ask the neighbors to turn down the music, but he was quickly greeted by giggling girls with their tops over their heads. He returned to the room with the music still blaring.

So, the rest of their vacation went about the same. Vomit, loud obnoxious music and behavior, underage body parts, binge drinking and absolutely no sleep for the entire family the entire vacation.

And, this all could have been avoided if they had chosen a different location either 40 miles east or west.

Tips for choosing the right vacation location for families:

Avoid the hotspots. Panama City Beach is the number one party destination in Florida. In fact, MTV loves to film its spring break series there every year. If you want to go to an MTV booty dance party, this place is for you. Families do not usually go to PCB for vacation. Families tend to pick spots like the Beaches of South Walton, Destin, Mexico Beach, Navarre, Apalachicola, Port St. Joe, among others.

Choose hotels that do not book to anyone under 25. Places that book to the 25 and under crowd cater to the 25 and under crowd.

Pick a hotel that does not have any groups booked. Call ahead and make sure that the hotel or resort has not booked a large group during spring break.

Schoolmates tend to travel together. In fact, some schools sponsor trips to places such as this.

Find hotels that only allow four people to a room. Young adults and teens tend to try and stuff as many people in one room as possible in order to save money.

Ask about room vacancies. If a large number of rooms are booked, you may have to fight for parking spaces, pool time and tables in the restaurants. A large number of vacancies is a good sign, but do not rely on that alone. Vacancies when every other hotel is booked up in town could indicate a scary hotel.

Spend a little more for a private beach home or resort. If you have to stay in a popular vacation destination, spend a little more money for some peace and quiet. The extra money spent will be well worth it after one night where Christine and Tom stayed.

Complain to management. So, you did not take any of the other advice and are now stuck next to 400 teenagers and college students. They are loud, obnoxious and rude. Go to management and express your concern. If this is a decent place, they will try to move your room to a quieter area. Don’t wait until it gets out of control.

With a little common sense and some good planning, you can avoid a vacation disaster. There is no reason that your trip should be ruined by a bunch of teenage girls that cannot keep their clothes on.

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